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A Man's Emotions

# 1  5/31/12 6:42 PM

Why do guys go from "I Miss You & Wanna See You" to "This Is Moving Too Fast?"  We meet, we hit it off naturally without trying at all and it goes from hot to cold for no apparent reason.  Start off texting and calling everyday, seeing each other at least once a week, then all the sudden put the brakes on....not so sure what all that is about.  Help from you guys out there please.  I have plenty of ideas to the answer, just want to hear from a man's point of view.  I just know I want a sincere, upfront, blunt, honest, respectful, and loyal person in my life, not into playing head games....can go pick up a bar fly for a one night stand and games.

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# 2  9/4/12 11:58 PM

From a gay man's point of view, we tend to have more than one thing on our minds with today's economy. Not all guys want to jump right into a relationship even though it appears that way at first. A man's thoughts can change direction at any moment, maybe a hobby, or situation in their life they are not sharing with you has required more of their attention, and guys are not the best at sharing their emotions and thoughts about their emotions. I hope this is and acceptable point of view, good luck. Remember just give him room but don't forget him, if it's meant to be he'll come back around.

# 3  9/8/12 10:32 PM

One thing that I'll mention is that believe it or not, guys have many of the same concerns and fears that women have regarding relationships.  My guess is that he might be apprehensive about investing a lot emotionally into a new relationship, if he's not sure how it might go.  One thing to understand is that unlike women, guys don't really know how to effectively deal with emotions that are at play in a new relationship.  We can (or were taught) how to deal with rage, anger, aggression, etc. (the ones that can be channeled in sports), but not the "softer" emotions.  They can be almost foreign to many of us.  That's one of the reasons that some guys can come off as insensitive or uncaring-mainly because we don't all know  how best to process those emotions and how best to use them.  It's almost like a wiring issue.
Best of luck!

# 4  9/9/12 11:59 AM

I don't think we have enough info for an accurate answer really.  Here are some wild guesses...
1. You haven't settled on your relationship status and he isn't committed to being exclusive to you.
2. As was said earlier, he has other things on his plate and feels he doesn't have enough time or interest to invest to you.
3. Guys go through a honeymoon phase which is a often a physical attraction before reality sets in and they approach a long term commitment with caution.

I hope that offers some ideas anyway.  Good luck!

# 5  9/9/12 6:14 PM

I my self have done this and as it turns out, either he has found another person on the side and wants to have his cake and eat it to or there is an issue sexually. He doesnt want to hurt your feels but he was not satisfyed in bed and instead of him breaking it off with you he rather not be to blame so wants you to end it with him so he can leave with a clear conchence.

# 6  9/22/12 9:26 PM

expecting too much from somebody in less time, trying to tie him up into commitments, being too possessive about him,will result in him going away from you,, give him his time, space and freedom and he may come back to you one day.

# 7  9/23/12 12:01 AM

CorpTaxGuy...Your reply was honest and provided some necessary insight into the male mind.  Thank you!

# 8  10/14/12 10:38 PM

You didn't really give a lot of info to go on.  My guess is that you may know the answer.

# 9  1/25/14 5:55 PM

yogit45769 wrote:

From a gay man's point of view, we tend to have more than one thing on our minds with today's economy. Not all guys want to jump right into a relationship even though it appears that way at first. A man's thoughts can change direction at any moment, maybe a hobby, or situation in their life they are not sharing with you has required more of their attention, and guys are not the best at sharing their emotions and thoughts about their emotions. I hope this is and acceptable point of view, good luck. Remember just give him room but don't forget him, if it's meant to be he'll come back around.

Good advice its like they want to know about you and you them all is good then they want
you to back off , that's when you hear from them and then days go by nothing and not responding
to your text? time to move on??

# 10  3/20/14 7:49 AM

Everyone male response made some sense and a male friend of mine gave me a few insights on dating and mens minds months ago and yes they have a harder time expressing their true feelings.  The honeymoon phase, the chase, but texting and calling every day?  Even I wouldn't want that because I would feel smothered myself and want a cooling off time.   As a woman was I being needy, clingy, wanting attention all the time?  My past experience shows that and am grateful for my male friend but I had to learn the hard way, especially getting back into the dating game after my husband died.

# 11  3/20/14 7:51 AM

randy71777 wrote:

You didn't really give a lot of info to go on.  My guess is that you may know the answer.

True.  One sided.

# 12  4/5/14 12:42 AM

[b][/b)

Because the person you are talking about isnt a man, anyone like that is a little wimpy pathetic boy who has no regards for womens emotions. He is still yet that Jock in highschool who feels that he must dominate by himself and please himself. the guy is clearly a hedonist. Hedonists are those who live for one purpose in life only and that is pleasure! The guy seems to be acting immature to protect his sensitive psyche. It is a facade that he uses to mask the fellings he is partaking in due to feeling demasculated with age. He feels that he is not a man or a stud but a bag of skin with tattered bones, and veins filled with ancient dust and sand.

# 13  5/3/14 10:59 PM

Goes to show that giving them what they want is not a good idea until you are sure they are going to give you what you want ...
But I am very traditional with things like that.  On the other hand if those were purely social dates and they back off I would not be sore at all.  That is why I avoid one night stands like plague - they have to prove some form of commitment over time first.  If they are after just getting laid and pissing off they can look elsewhere and no one loses face.

# 14  5/15/14 1:03 PM

In the situation you are describing where the relationship didn't suddenly have any big sudden changes I'd say that the guy realized that they were getting into something that could involve a long term commitment and they are scared of commitments.  And this isn't just something I've seen guys do.  I've had a couple girls do this to me.